An Excerpt from my Untitled BDSM Cowboy/Western MMF Menage,
Jacob Hargate could not imagine himself going to a BDSM club. How could he give himself so openly to his Master with so many prying eyes watching their every move? He wondered if his Master had ever performed a scene in public. He knew their wife hadn't because she had become acquainted with the lifestyle when she fell in love with their Master like him. Before falling in love with his Master, BDSM was nothing more than something people made inappropriate jokes about at cocktail parties. And now here he was, deeply engaged in it and loving every minute of it. Could he have done this without the gentle understanding and guidance, he received daily from his Master? He did not know, however he was grateful to be able to partake of something that was so healing that every day was a reminder that when hindrances arose, he should be still, wait and not make decisions while upset.
He felt a gentle brush of his Master's finger across his chin. It was a sign to keep his mind on target. Jake sighed. One of his Master's main points of instruction was for him to stay in the present. He said the core of his anxiety was rooted in his tendency stray away from the moment. He recalled his Master's instructions and allowed the calm of the moment to fill him. Jake beamed inwardly. His Master was so astute. His desire to please him grew. Just then something rough and prickly pinched his skin. He concentrated on the sensation. It was a thick rope bounded around his torso and arms. It tightened not enough to restrict his breathing but just enough to make the nerves in his body tingle. Instantly all errant thoughts fled his mind. He smiled as his Master's clean fresh scent wafted to his nose. A hint of soap leftover from his morning shower mixed with the citrusy grassy aroma from his aftershave.
He recalled hearing of a school thought that taught in order to ease anxiety, one had to push one's thoughts away from the present. Or better yet, devoid one's mind of all thoughts completely. Kind of like making one's mind a blank slate. He smiled. A task like that for an anxious mind was likely to be more stressful than the problem itself because the act of attempting to erase all thoughts made he or she more aware of them along with the original problem. Therefore the person is thrown into feeling of failure and worry. An endless that won't stop unless something break the cycle.
Instead, one must tune into the moment. Grounding one self not in the fear or anxiety inducing situation but become aware of their environment. Where you are in your space? Are you sitting or standing? Is the chair made of wood? Is the floor hard or soft? What does the air smell like? It's an effective grounding technique to not become controlled by anger, fear or anxiety.
His biggest problem was with fear. Not with criminals, the boogey man or robbers and thieves. But with failure and the compromising of his safety. For years, as officer in navy intelligence it was drummed into him that he'd never if or when his mission could be exposed thereby placing him and others like him in jeopardy. And though, he never showed it on the outside, he always carried this nagging suspicion that if he didn't keep everything concealed and free from outsiders his whole world would collapse. It was probably his initial meeting with his Master had ended so poorly. Meeting a man who could read him so well was downright scary.
But as time went on, he managed to work through most of his problems and cope with the rest. In BDSM he learned that fear was almost always related to the unknown and anxiety was due to an inability to control the uncontrollable. Worrying and unhealthy fear changed nothing, so it was better to embrace the present which enabled him to control his actions. While doing this, he was able to assess what he was capable of doing and did not concern himself with what he was not.
Jake inhaled deeply and centered his mind concentrated on the sensation of his body he knelt on the floor. The plush, soft carpet enveloped his knees. It smelled of fresh flowers from the cleaner that their wife loved to use. He adjusted his position on the carpet, spreading his legs farther apart further increasing the tension on his legs. He groaned with pleasure, then flexed his chest and back muscles. Stimulated to the fullest, his mind threatened to overload.
